Be Sour: WWE’s Big E and Five Lessons In Mental Health Awareness

WWE’s Big E recently wrote an article that went in-depth into his mental health. This has reverberated throughout the industry and has reignited a very important discussion.

Our wrestling fandom is driven by mythology. Regardless of how much or little we individually buy into kayfabe, we simplify our stories, selecting and reliving the moments that make us happy. Yet, often, we gloss over and streamline the reality, in and out of the ring.

Wrestlers become heroes elevated above being human. When a wrestler contributes to The Players’ Tribune, it feels special because they invite us to glimpse them as a human being. Usually, with honesty and vulnerabilities we often can’t imagine.

In the case of Ettore “Big E” Ewen’s article “Sour”, the former New Day member looks at himself in the mirror from the perspective of his nine-year-old self. And, in turn, makes us look at the man we think we know.

We’re invited to see his battle with a topic that affects many of us and that some have yet to acknowledge. An internal battle that comes with an impossible wish…

“To be absolutely anyone else.”

Big E, Sour.

If you haven’t, it is a must-read article. And from Big E’s own experience, here are five lessons that many of us can learn from about how we can help ourselves and others. And about cultural myths and expectations beyond pro wrestling that cause us harm.

1. Big E Learnt That Escape Helps, but Vocabulary is Key

Some still hold the notion that being a child is/should be a worriless time of innocence. As a teacher, I have supported pupils even younger than Big E who wished to be someone else. Who have and still deal with complex mental health issues.

Body dysmorphia, anxiety, etc. There are understandable but also complex reasons for how and why these problems happen. It happens and denial of it continues the cycle.

The effect of Big E’s father’s strictness left marks. Fear from the promise of hell for being disobedient. Getting spanked for messing up chores.

His mother put in a position where nurturing harmed self-sufficiencies set the foundations. That and other factors create deep-rooted problems. I can relate to Big E’s self-loathing.

As a teen, my headphones protected me from the outside world. My iPod was loaded with music that reflected my own low self-esteem, including plenty of WWE themes. “Slow Chemicals”, Kane’s classic theme fits my sense of self.

I felt like Kane. A hideous unlovable monster. Psychologically scarred.

I believed what the bullies and my peers told me. I was worthless unless I achieved.

Like Big E, many of us pursue hobbies and sports to manage emotions. Big E escaped into football. I escaped into rugby.

You could hit and exercise your demons temporarily. However, you can’t outrun something that’s part of you.

The exercise that does shake them off (for a time) is talking. As a kid (or even an adult), you might not have the words. You must learn those to understand and advocate for yourself.

An issue Big E reflects on:

“At the time I had nothing. It was the most confusing feeling in the world.”

Big E, Sour.

2. Help Changes Everything

“The older I got, as I moved through high school and toward college, the more it felt like my body and mind were both slowly killing me. But it’s wild how it works in life. On the inside you might feel like you’re dying … and on the outside you might look like you’re not only coping, you’re thriving.”

Big E, Sour.

Success is momentary. Just like with neurodivergence, some folks adapt and overcompensate to excel. The same can be true with mental health difficulties.

It can often feed a perfectionism, a need to be an imposter. Something in wrestling the character of “Hangman” Adam Page battled.

Big E used football success to compensate but untreated issues resulted in cracks. Academic dissatisfaction led to failure because Big E did not follow his own heart and instead followed societal pressure into pre-med. Then on the gridiron, there were injuries.

One thing in Big E’s control; the other beyond it. The combination of factors dogpiled on existing issues causing a mental spiral. Depression, thoughts of suicide and self-harm.

While we can help ourselves, everyone needs help and support. Big E was lucky. A coach paid attention and offered help before it was too late.

Some people cannot or are unable to ask for help. They still need support. And when we can only help someone so much, we can signpost or direct them to someone/someplace they can get aid.

3. Stigma Exists and Cures Aren’t Magic

Men have a problem with acknowledging hurt – physical or mental. When writing about The Bloodline and toxic masculinity, I referenced how a refusal for men to acknowledge pain can and has killed us.

A stigma exists still around treatment and diagnosis. For black men, who are more likely to be diagnosed with severe mental health problems, there are additional stigmas and difficulties.

Big E’s openness to going to a psych ward demystifies our nightmare assumptions. For example, electroshock therapy in the films “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” and “Requiem for a Dream” is depicted as torture and punishment. While the treatment is not without its problems, it’s also a highly effective means of treating depression.

As Big E discusses, some folks need to try various treatments. Some worked. Some didn’t.

At times, the experience was horrific before things got better. The process isn’t painless or easy, but trial and error. There’s not a one-and-done cure.

4. No One Does It Alone

Our culture’s monomyth erases one thing: no one does anything alone. Throughout the article, whether it’s talking about college or pro wrestling or his current state of career limbo, Big E highlights how his success involves other people. No one succeeds alone.

Help didn’t just come from a coach. It came from a therapist and psychiatric help.

In WWE, it came from producers and friendships with Kofi Kingston and Xavier Woods. At present, his relationship with Kristen provides stability through uncertainty.

We achieve nothing alone. And folks are there throughout beyond the destination. As Big E describes the journey of The New Day, like life, has been mixed:

“Some of its crushing failure. Some of its wild success. Some of its deeply silly. Some of it’s quite serious. Some of its cringe as hell. Some of it’s cool as hell. Some of it’s painful. Some of it’s joyful. And every now and then, if you get really lucky, some of it’s meaningful.”

Big E, Sour.

Our journey is not solitary.

5. Big E Says Be Sour

Ending his reflection, Big E’s message to his nine-year-old self can be applied to everyone. You have down moments, no matter where you are in life.

“It’s OK to get frustrated, or sad, or down on yourself — or even wake up some mornings and not want to be yourself. It’s OK to have bad days.

But just keep having days. Just keep going. Just keep waking up and trying again.

Because every day won’t be like that, I promise.”

Big E, Sour.

No matter how good your life is, there will always be downs. I’m living my dream. I teach and write and get paid to do both.

I’ve got pretty much everything I could want. Family, friends, and dogs that love me.

None of those things stopped the following thought earlier this year. “Who would care if I disappeared?”

It was a dark thought. One that scared me. One that I accepted was sour but it had value.

There were problems that I was not talking about. I talked and those feelings disappeared. Being sour gave me the power to address a problem in my life.

As Big E, concludes: “Tomorrow is a new day.”

More From LWOS Pro Wrestling

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