Stupid Musings from Around the Premier League – Volume 1
As I drifted in and out of consciousness today at work, I got thinking of some of the ridiculous comments I read that becomes the subject of what passes as football news these day. So, rather than fight it, I thought I would embrace it, if only for a fleeting moment or two. So, I now present to you for the first time, the first edition of “Stupid Musings from Around the Premier League”.
1. Scott Parker, on “Mario Balotelli”
Perhaps the most ridiculous article I read today was entirely based on Scott Parker’s “in-depth” analysis of Mario Balotelli’s game. In the article, the Spurs midfield reveals that the Italian is good. Really, there’s not much more than that. Rather than me paraphrasing, here is just a glimpse of his insight:
“He’s a very good player and someone we are going to have to keep our eye on him.”
Really, Scott, the only analysis you can give us is to tell us that Balotelli is a good player? I wonder if you spilled the beans on England’s defensive gameplan when you said “…we are going to have to keep our eye on him.” What does that even mean? Don’t you keep an eye on all strikers on the pitch? Or are some so very bad that you don’t even need to keep tabs on? Moreover, consider that someone felt Scott Parker’s analysis needed to be shared with the world.
2. Denilson to return to Arsenal
“Denilson won’t stay. Arsenal want €6million for him, but we won’t pay that so we expect him to leave soon. Of course we will try to get the loan deal extended for another year, but it won’t be easy.”
I will assume that many readers are not Arsenal fans. If you are, you will completely understand my reasoning about why this is stupid simply by reading the title. If you are not a Gooner, let me explain. Denilson was full of promise when Le Professeur brought Denilson to the Emirates from Brazil. But since then, it has been nothing but misery for him, for his impact (or lack thereof) on the team, and most importantly to Arsenal supporters. He was chased so fast from North London even Spurs fans felt sorry for him. So the very fact that Arsenal are expecting anything at all for him on loan to Sao Paulo is just stupid, as painful as it is to admit.
3. Arshavin to be deported
Well, he’s not going to be deported, but if you ask Zenit owner, Valery Galubev, he should be. After Russia’s early exit from Euro 2012, Andrei Arshavin, who featured so well for Russia to open the tournament, had this to say about the loss:
”If you have had high expectations for our team here, then it’s your problem, not ours.”
Okay, what a stupid thing to say. Of course we had high expectations – Russia was supposed to be a great team. The Arsenal mid was Russia’s captain, and apparently was not eager to go down with the ship.
As stupid as Arshavin’s comment was, it is at least matched by Galubev’s comment:
“How can a citizen of Russia treat the honour of his country like that? He should be deported.”
Excuse me? You want to deport a guy from your country because he told people it was their fault for having high expectations? Sheesh.
Alright lads, here you have the Stupidest Musings from Around the Premier League, Vol. #1. I will be back next Friday with volume #2. I am sure I will have no shortage of stupidity from which to draw upon.
…until tomorrow, lads.
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