Spring is in the air, and as a result, it’s great to be back again this week. In case you missed them, there are the stories that have been making waves this past week in the world of pro sports:
NCAAB
How about the upsets from the first week of March Madness? I haven’t seen so many grown men shed tears of anguish since the season finale of “Deadliest Warrior” on Spike TV.
Yes indeed, there have been a lot of surprises in the tournament so far. Wichita State lost to Kentucky, Kansas lost to Stanford, and Syracuse lost the ability to make three-pointers.
Andrew Wiggins in particular looked dejected when he met the media after the Stanford game – not because his team lost, but because there’s a chance he’ll get drafted by the Milwaukee Bucks.
Speaking of awkward TV, did you see awkward interview that Greg Gumble did with Archie Miller after his Flyers defeated the Orange? I mean, the last time I saw that many uncomfortable pauses in the span of a few minutes, Kim Kardashian was saying her wedding vows.
Here’s a crazy March Madness stat: for the first time in 35 years, no team from North Carolina made it the Sweet Sixteen. It’s not all bad though – members of the coaching staff can still go home to a loving spouse, who was formerly a loving sibling.
NBA
Shaquille O’Neal is being investigated by Atlanta police for the alleged assault of a co-worker at Turner Studios. Apparently, he doesn’t like it when Charles Barkley beats him in the annual company spelling bee.
Mark Cuban said that the NFL is ten years away from imploding. Suffice it to say, the Mavericks organization wasn’t happy – not because of his comments, but because they found out that Cuban’s ego is still 35 years away from imploding.
NHL
The Leafs have plummeted in the Eastern Conference standings from 3rd overall to 10th. To their credit, Toronto fans are taking this latest tank-job quite well – they’re calling it “the real sign that spring is finally here”.
To make matters worse for the Leafs, Dion Phaneuf avoided the media after his team’s loss on Tuesday. I guess this means his relationship with the press is like his effort level in the defensive zone: non-existent.
Here’s a funny story: Canucks forward Alex Burrows reportedly chipped his tooth on a granola bar. That’s right – not only do hockey players have horrible teeth, but now some have horrible stories about how they got horrible teeth.
Chicago forward Patrick Sharp successfully photobombed two newlyweds who were taking pictures in between the benches during warm-ups. I mean, you think hockey players have guts? The bride is a grown woman who wore an extremely expensive white dress to a Blackhawks home game.
MLB
Opening Day is just around the corner and everyone’s still buzzing about the games played in Australia last weekend. The most shocking moment of all was when that dingo came along and ate the Diamondbacks’ playoff chances.
Speaking of buzz, David Ortiz has signed a 1-year, $16 million extension with the Red Sox. I think that’s a little much – I mean, I can spit into my palms before an at-bat too and no one pays me a dime.
Did you get a peek at the blazers that the Red Sox will wear to the White House this year? Even Craig Sager recoiled in horror when he saw that picture.
Here’s something kind of scary: the Chicago White Sox will be selling a twelve-scoop (!) banana split in a full-sized batting helmet at concession stands. Apparently it’s part of the team’s new motto – put fans into a diabetic coma before they see us blow a save in the ninth.
AND FINALLY …
Buckeyes head coach Urban Meyer had to apologize to the Columbus Blue Jackets and the Columbus Crew after he said there “were really no professional sports teams” in Ohio. Theoretically though, if you’re going with Meyer’s line of thinking, after his team lost to Clemson in the Orange Bowl, there aren’t any professional-level athletes in the state either.
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