You and I both know footy is filled with fantastical storylines, embellished headlines and completely fabricated news. Football is at a pivotal point in many ways – scandals, match-fixing, rampant racism, rioting, and then there are the on-the-pitch troubles as well. Consider the ever-growing “diving culture”, as well as the controversy as to whether to bring in replay and goal-line technology. Jeez, what’s a bloke to do?
My intent for this column is to bring you the day’s best headlines, along with a little wry, honest and critical commentary, in as compact a manner as I can muster. After all, who has time to sift through dozens of articles when a sentence or two will do? Not I, and likely not you either. So, in less than 300 words you will get the day’s headlines and then at least you will have an idea of what is worth looking into and what is utter shite.
Why Two Left Cleats? Well, simply “Left Cleats” is a moniker that was bestowed to me by my mates I played youth football with back in the day as a way to “celebrate” my desire to add a left foot to my game – I am a righty, and could never really develop a left foot. Try as I did, it just wasn’t happening for me.
To end the suspension, here are today’s headlines:
We have all see Nani‘s red card. Was it a red? God, no. Did it cost United? Of course. Do I give a rat’s arse? Not really – where were United fans when Arsenal were robbed in their match vs. Barca in 2011? At least Mourinho looked embarrassed……Nicklas Bendtner was fined $147,000 for drunk driving. His blood alcohol level was three times the legal limit. Maybe that explains why he played so piss-poor for Arsenal all those years – he was bloody drunk on the pitch! It all makes sense now……Apparently Kaka has been called to the Brazil squad after being left out earlier this year, while Ronaldinho was left out. Ronaldinho still plays football? My bad……In a case of “you have to hear to believe”, organizers for the World Cup in Brazil are setting aside a section of seats for the obese. Seriously, there is a section specially for the rotund. Hopefully it’s not near the front row – make them climb! To qualify you need a BMI of over 30 – they are calling the section, “Mississippi”……Liverpool‘s debt rose to 87.2 million pounds (about $131 million) between Aug. 1, 2011 and May 31, 2012. What will it be after they sell Suarez?……Finally, Celtic manager Neil Lennon has warned official Firat Aydinus, who will referee the match against Juventus on Wednesday, to call the game fairly. Really, has Juventus every gotten any calls at home in Torino? Pshaw, just a few……
And there you have the headlines people are talking about. Feel free to comment on any of these below, or join thousands of footy fans as they discuss the beautiful game at r/football.
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