Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, fans and friends of the WWE, welcome to yet another Monday Night Raw Review from the “bro that runs the show“, Ryan Smith. This week, the show is taking in place in Minneapolis, Minnesota. The fun thing about Minneapolis? It’s the home of one Brock Lesnar, who was in attendance tonight. What did The Beast Incarnate have to say? Did anyone take an F5? Find out below.
Monday Night Raw Review (10/24/16)
Chris Jericho
The show opened with Chris Jericho coming to the ring by himself, looking downtrodden. He said that he had some bad news, and explained that the triple threat between himself, Kevin Owens, and Seth Rollins had been cancelled. He explained that this was because someone had stolen the List of Jericho. He stood tall, and claimed that he wouldn’t leave the ring until someone returned the list.
His best friend, Kevin Owens, came out, and the two bickered. Jericho insisted he couldn’t wrestle until the list was returned to him. It was at this point that Stephanie McMahon came out and told Jericho he needed to focus on the triple threat. Jericho continued to throw a temper tantrum until Seth Rollins came out, hiding the list behind his back.
The best part about this segment was how ridiculous it was. They were literally arguing about the list, and everyone sold it so well. Stephanie McMahon and Kevin Owens were horrified to find themselves on the list, and Chris Jericho was throwing a hilarious temper tantrum the entire time.
Unfortunately, the segment seemed to drag on a little too long. Babyface Seth Rollins started off hot, but he has begun to lose steam. Instead of being a focused, furious face like he was at first, he’s started to resort to childish humor and lengthy, self-righteous promos.
Segment/Match Quality- 7/10 Woo’s
Karl Anderson w/Luke Gallows vs. Enzo Amore w/Big Cass
Enzo Amore and Big Cass came out, and began doing their normal schtick when the microphones sizzled out. Instead, it was Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson that had the microphones. This didn’t stop Enzo and Cass, as they shouted their lines and the crowd played along anyway.
Anderson tried his best to carry Enzo to a good match, but the whole bout came off as sloppy. There wasn’t a ton of psychology, and the entire match seemed dedicated to Enzo being scrappy. Halfway through the match, Cass distracted the referee while Anderson rolled Enzo up for a five count. Angered by this, Gallows jumped on the ring. This also distracted the ref, allowing Cass to hit Anderson with a boot, giving Enzo the win.
This whole feud has done nothing but make Gallows and Anderson look weak, and it’s unclear what the WWE is trying to do by having babyfaces cheat to beat this team. It made no sense at all, and you almost start wondering if Gallows and Anderson can get out of their contracts and go back to Japan.
Segment/Match Quality- 2/10 Woo’s
The New Day vs. Sheasaro (Why Not?)
The New Day came out and began immediately harping on Sheamus again. They talked about incredibly talented Cesaro is, while burying Sheamus. Sheamus and Cesaro made their way to the ring, and it looked like they were still doing the bickering couple routine.
Kofi and Cesaro started the match, and then something bizarre happened. Cesaro actually tagged Sheamus in. Sheamus’ stiff wrestling style compliments Cesaro’s grappling style well, like the old LenDale White and Reggie Bush team at USC.
There was a particularly great spot where Kofi was in the corner, and Sheasaro had their own Unicorn Stampede. But instead of tagging each other in, they kept tagging themselves in, getting a huge hit, only to get tagged out so the other member could throw a stiff punch.
There was another great moment as Kofi went over the top rope to hit Sheamus, only to catch an uppercut from Cesaro. With Big E distracted, Sheamus hit the Brogue Kick for the win. It’s good to see that these two are finally starting to work well together, even if they still bickered outside the match.
Segment/Match Quality- 8/10 Woo’s
Dana Brooke vs. Bayley
After the last meeting between these two was a disaster, Dana Brooke asked for a rematch. Then she stated that their rematch was an arm-wrestling match. Which… doesn’t really make it a rematch because they’ve never had a rematch.
Bayley was selling her shoulder injury, and immediately recoiled. So she switched arms. The fans ate this segment alive, chanting “This is stupid” and “boring” them the two women. Bayley was holdering her own, and then Brooke began attacking her. Ms. Piggy went to finish Bayley off before everyone’s favorite Girl Next Door hit her with “Bayley to Belly”.
This earned a single woo because it had storyline implications, but this segment was “Old Day” levels of stupid.
Segment/Match Quality- 1/10 Woo’s
Curtis Axel vs. Bo Dallas
Curtis Axel came to the ring and cut a promo on Bo Dallas. He played the hometown hero card, even wearing a shirt that says “Skol Axel Skol”. He played up that he was a third generation superstar that wasn’t going to let Bo get away with it. It…was actually a solid promo.
And then Bo Dallas came out.
The two immediately began brawling, having a pretty stiff match. It went in and out of the ring, and Bo was eventually able to roll Axel up for the win.
It might not make sense, but these two actually had a pretty good match. Hopefully this continues and these two can regain some momentum. It’s crazy to think that both of these men are third-generation superstars that haven’t gotten preferential treatment.
Segment/Match Quality- 8/10 Woo’s
The Golden Truth w/ Mark Henry vs. The Shining Stars w/ Titus O’Neil
Oh god. This again. Admittedly, this wasn’t as bad as the first one, but that’s because they focused on the in-ring stuff. All four men are good workers, and the wrestling was fine. Unfortunately, that’s all the match was. It was just fine. Titus O’Neil and Mark Henry had a scuffle at the end before Golden Truth got the win, and you kinda felt like those two could’ve had this feud on their own.
Segment/Match Quality- 3/10 Woo’s
Sasha Banks and Charlotte Contract Signing
When we came back from commercial, Mick Foley was standing in the ring. He welcomed both women to the ring, and he applauded their achievements, specifically in regards to how much they’ve progressed women’s wrestling. Foley reminded both of them how dangerous Hell in a Cell matches are. It’s sad, but it feels like Mick Foley is the only one selling how dangerous the Cell matches are supposed to be. Considering the pay per view will feature three Cell matches, you’d think they’d want to push it harder.
Charlotte cut an outstanding promo about how much value she brought to the title and how she’s the queen of the WWE. Sasha Banks responded by saying there isn’t a queen, but there is a boss.
This segment dragged on, and it’s a shame because Mick Foley cut one hell of a promo about what he’s given to this business. Contract signings almost always end in violence, but after Foley’s promo, it just wouldn’t have felt right.
Segment/Match Quality- 7/10 Woo’s
Rich Swann vs. Brian Kendrick
WWE CruiserWeight Champion T.J. Perkins joined the commentary team as his opponent at Hell in a Cell, Brian Kendrick, took on Rich Swann. Swann is easily most of the most charismatic wrestlers in the WWE, and the Universe is already behind him in a big way.
Rich Swann kept busting out fun, innovative moves, but no matter what, Kendrick kept escaping. Kendrick tried to lock Swann in the “Captain’s Hook”, but Swann reversed it and rolled him up for the three count.
As has been the case every week, the cruiserweights put on a very good, very fast, very electric match. The crowd was better this week, but unfortunately, most of the match happened during a commercial break. Raw needs to consider using the double-box like the other show does.
Segment/Match Quality- 7/10 Woo’s
Braun Strowman vs. Sami Zayn
For the second straight week, WWE decided to follow a Susan G. Komen spot with Braun Strowman‘s terrifying music. It didn’t make sense last week, and it doesn’t make sense now. Much to the chagrin of indy fans everywhere, Sami Zayn did come down to face the monster.
Strowman decided that Zayn wasn’t enough competition so he began asking Foley for another opponent when Zayn attacked him from behind. Zayn slapped him and then proceeded to run around the ring as Strowman chased him. Zayn attempted to jump out of the ring at Strowman, but the monster caught him and flung him into the barricade before walking away.
Nobody told Zayn the match was over, however, as he crawled back into the ring, clutching his lower back. Strowman didn’t think he was worth it, however, and walked into the back. The match started out great, but deciding to have Strowman simply walk away after one move is puzzling.
Segment/Match Quality- 3/10 Woo’s
Brock Lesnar
Surprisingly, Brock Lesnar didn’t close the show! The Beast Incarnate made his way to the ring, accompanied by Paul Heyman, to a hometown hero’s reception. The biggest draw in combat sports sauntered to the ring as they replayed Goldberg‘s challenge from the week before.
The cool part about this segment was the crowd chanting “Suplex City” and “Goldberg” back and forth at each other. Everyone has been burying this match, saying they don’t want to see it, but apparently that isn’t the case.
For some reason, Heyman was off his game. He was stuttering and stammering, and seemed more defensive than usual. Maybe this was because he was acting scared, or maybe he just watched the CM Punk/Mickey Gall fight and he was thrown off. He let the Goldberg/Suplex City chant go on a little longer than he should’ve and didn’t really say anything.
This was surprising because usually Heyman is fantastic. Usually Brock Lesnar destroys someone in the ring. This whole segment was unnecessary, and a waste of whatever money they paid Lesnar and Heyman to show up.
Segment/Match Quality- 2/10 Woo’s
Seth Rollins vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens
As the match started, Owens and Jericho both slid out of the ring, leaving Rollins alone. Then they split up and surrounded The Architect. Rollins rolled out of the ring, and gestured at both men to fight. Jericho chased Rollins into the ring, but Owens stayed behind. Rollins kicked him anyway and began fighting Jericho.
The match eventually left the ring, and Rollins had to fight off both men. Eventually, Rollins dumped Jericho over the barricade and it became a one-on-one match. Rollins ended up working for most of the match before they began really working on him.
They took turns beating him up before Rollins escaped a pop-up powerbomb, superkicked Jericho, and dove out of the ring at Kevin Owens. He limped back to the ring, climbed to the top rope and tried to hit a frog-splash on Jericho, only to miss. Jericho hit the Codebreaker, but Rollins kicked out.
The two Canadians put Seth Rollins on the turnbuckle, but he reversed it, rolling them both to the mat for the pin. They didn’t mourn the loss for long however, as they rolled out of the ring and began beating Rollins down. Owens was making his way up the ramp when Rollins escaped the referees and attacked Owens from behind. The two brawled at ringside until Kevin Owens powerbombed Rollins onto the apron.
Segment/Match Quality- 8/10 Woo’s
Best Segment/Match of the Night- Seth Rollins vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens
With three men this talented in a match with this many subplots, it was bound to be great. Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens are best friends, but are they really? Seth Rollins and Kevin Owens have a championship match in a couple of day. And Seth Rollins stole the list! It was a technically sound match with plenty of storyline to boot.
This match drew on the tension between Owens and Jericho, made Seth Rollins look strong, and built up their match on Sunday. All in all, a really strong match.
Worst Segment/Match of the Night- Bayley vs. Dana Brooke
This was just terrible. Unless these two are going to put on a wrestling clinic this Sunday, this wasn’t worth it. It accomplished it’s goal in that it established Bayley’s injury and continued the feud, but that was about it. Nobody got any heat, nobody looks any stronger because of it, and whatever good will Dana Brooke had built up in the triple threat feud is gone.
Show Quality- 4/10 Woo’s
This was not a good show. Despite being the go-home show for a pay per view, the show just sucked. There were so many screwy finishes and bad segments and stale promos that it was draining to watch. James Ellsworth is driving crowds wild on SmackDown Live! And this is all Monday Night Raw can do? Hell in a Cell better be a great show, or else covering Raw might become more of a chore than a privilege.
Read More: Monday Night Raw Review (10/17/2016)
