Frequent readers of mine will know that I am terrible at making good predictions. Forget Bad Lip Reading, I could turn Awful MLS Predictions into a Youtube sensation and retire by the time I’m 30.
Back in March I made my predictions as to how the 2014 MLS season would go down. With the regular season having come to a close, I thought that now was as good a time as ever to do some self-evaluation. Let’s just say that I won’t be searching for jobs in the fortune telling industry anytime soon.
Rookie of the Year:
I used some advanced analytics (basically a Google search of the history of the award) to choose Colorado’s Marlon Hairston at the start of the year. But by looking too deep into the past, I forgot the current direction of both the league and the award.
The academy system is taking over from college teams as the best source of young talent. There is still something to be gained from colleges however. Hairston made 22 appearances for the Rapids, while my buffer pick, Dallas’ Tesho Akindele, scored seven goals and has garnered lots of support for his Rookie of the Year campaign.
But I don’t even think that Akindele can stop Harrison Shipp, Chicago’s Home Grown sensation, from getting the award. But hey, one of my buffer picks could put up a fight! Not a bad start.
Comeback Player of the Year:
I picked Steve Zakuani, knowing that he had a mountain to climb but realizing that if he reached the summit he would win at the drop of a pin. He appeared in 17 matches for the Portland Timbers, which is still rather impressive considering the freak injury he sustained back in 2011.
But he’s not going to win this thing. My first buffer pick, Vancouver’s Jay Demerit, retired after more injury woes. My other buffer pick, New England’s Teal Bunbury, didn’t do too badly for himself, scoring four goals, assisting on six, and getting ten times the number of minutes he got in 2013.
Dare I throw Clint Dempsey’s name in the discussion? Though he didn’t play much last season, Seattle was borderline bad at the end of last year. Now they have their sights set on a treble. That’s what I would call a comeback.
Your guess for this award is as good as mine. But don’t rule out yet another big name winning this one.
Newcomer of the Year:
I picked Jermain Defoe, which statistically doesn’t look too bad almost eight months later. Those 11 goals came in what was virtually a half season of work. A combination of good health and greater trust in North American medical personnel may have seen him take a stranglehold on this award.
Both Portland’s Fanendo Adi and Vancouver’s Pedro Morales come to mind for this title. But Morales will likely get it. He’s the undisputed cornerstone of Vancouver’s attack, has become the club captain, and still passes the ball like a Catalonian.
Coach of the Year:
This self-evaluation is about to get really sour. I picked Pablo Mastroeni out in Colorado out of the expectation that the Rapids would take a big step forward this year. In case you missed it, the Rapids haven’t won since July and have picked up a mere two points in their last 14 matches.
My best buffer pick was Jay Heaps; New England is actually taking the leap that I expected. But this one will probably go to Sigi Schmid in Seattle for rebounding from a near-firing to a season that could go down as one of the best in MLS history. Ben Olsen in D.C. could put up a fight though.
Goalkeeper of the Year:
Note to self: don’t pick a guy who is forced back to his parent club midway through the season. Julio Cesar played well when he was here, but he simply wasn’t here enough.
If you had asked me who wins before the All-Star break, I would have said Nick Rimando. I still want to say his name, but I have a feeling that D.C.’s Bill Hamid has done more than enough to secure the title.
Defender of the Year:
HOLD THE PHONES.
I picked Bobby Boswell of D.C. United to win. Guess which team conceded the fewest goals this season. United. Guess who, along with Hamid, gets full credit? Boswell.
Seattle’s Chad Marshall, who like Boswell has been named Defender of the Year before, could challenge. But surely there is hope that this is the one pick I will have successfully predicted.
Golden Boot:
Now this is the awful predicting I’m more used to seeing from myself.
19 combined goals were scored between my pick (Jack McInerney, Philadelphia/Montreal) and my buffers (Eddie Johnson, D.C. and Diego Fagundez, New England).
The top two this season, New York’s Bradley Wright-Phillips and Kansas City’s Dom Dwyer, each had more than 20.
But flash back eight months ago. Did you predict Bradley Wright-Phillips would win this thing? Did you think he would even hit double digits? Did you even know who he was?
Exactly. I didn’t either.
Most Valuable Player:
There are time when one should go with their heart. Picking an MVP isn’t one of them.
I picked Tim Cahill. Laugh all you will, but just try to remember how good he was in 2013 while you do. My buffer picks, Johnson and Kansas City’s Graham Zusi, are nowhere close to being in the discussion.
After winning their much-hyped series against Los Angeles, the Sounders have probably put Obafemi Martins in pole position to win. But there are a bunch of other names in this with a shout.
Supporter’s Shield and MLS Cup:
Sporting Kansas City couldn’t pull out a shield to complete their three-year long treble. Portland and New York let me down big time as buffer picks.
Did I mention that I also picked Portland and New York to play for the MLS Cup?
At least two of my buffer picks, New England and Seattle, are still looking very alive and well.
I said eight months ago that I wanted Henry and Cahill to win a cup together. My attention has now turned to Martins and Dempsey. Should they make it there, the Sounders will host MLS Cup. If they win it, their team may be the greatest in American history.
So there you have it, my awful MLS predictions for 2014 revisited.
Aside from the Boswell pick, the only thing I got right was that the season would “go completely opposite to how I… laid it out.”
Silver linings. Gotta love ‘em.
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