Welcome to the Lucha Crítica, where we look at this week’s Lucha Underground. Find out what happened as the highly anticipated season two begins!
Welcome back to the Temple. Did you miss it? I certainly did. I’m just not used to the idea of an off-season in pro wrestling but Lucha Underground provides it. It makes you anticipate and get excited for the product instead of wax and wane on its dull moments.
Lucha Underground Season Two Premiere
Vampiro has problems
The season begins with a recap of what happened in the first season followed by Vampiro being evaluated by a psychiatrist. I guess he’s not just “The Master” to Pentagon Jr. but a normal guy dealing with his psychotic breakdowns. It’s a bit odd to try to play both. How can he be a puppet master and just a regular guy with a mental condition? Either way, he fantasizes about beating everyone up before coming to his senses and accepting his medication. He’s released into a desert (?) to be met by Matt Striker, being a good friend. They reveal their low-rider to drive back to the Temple, which Striker has already made clear is far more darker than it ever has been. “Ian” (Vampiro) stares at his medication.
While not a weak link of last season compared to the Cueto/Black Lotus story, it’s certainly convoluted. Not much made sense here, but it looked cool enough for us to accept. This is honestly what Lucha Underground excels at most. It presents you something you might not exactly accept otherwise in such a way that you go with the flow to see the pay off. Last season it was Pentagon Jr. vs. Vampiro. This season? Guess we’ll see.
Temple Overthrow
The office of Lucha Underground owner Dario Cueto has been taken over by… Catrina? That’s an exciting turn of events. Not only did her minions win 2/3 championships but they took over the entire lease! Impressive. She meets with season one rival Fenix and tells him he’s defending the Gift of the Gods in the first match of the new season against our royal highness King Cuerno.
I like the direction of the hostile takeover and that we’re being reminded of the secondary championship created through the Aztec gold storyline. Fenix and King Cuerno are two perfect combatants to start off the second season: fan service that new fans can attach two immediately.
Gift of the Gods Championship
King Cuerno vs. Fenix (c)
Catrina teased that Fenix needs to hold onto the Gift of the Gods to ever challenge Mil Muertes and that Muertes would be watching them. She wasn’t lying. He sits on a throne where the bands used to play and watches the action like Shao Kahn. It means nothing to this review but I always wanted a wrestler to do that so this makes me all the more excited. Wait, wrestling match? Wrestling match!
I never truly warmed up to Fenix as a top three babyface in the company but it goes without saying that he has incredible balance and pose. His kicks are vicious. King Cuerno became my favourite wrestler in the business fast and this match shows you why. He’s one of the best combinations of strength, speed and execution in the wrestling business. When his original finisher didn’t work, King Cuerno decided to reach deep with a package tombstone that looked absolutely vicious. One, two, three? THREE! NEW GIFT OF THE GODS CHAMPION! Also, anyone else notice the new angles in the wrestling match? Don’t know if I totally feel them yet, but they certainly make the product look unlike any other.
When you win a championship on the first night back, it goes without question that you’re going to have the edge. Fenix talked a big game up to Catrina but he didn’t have a game plan like King Cuerno did. While Mil Muertes might sit on a throne, the true king is Cuerno. I might be thinking how odd it is for the belts to all be held by heels right now, but Lucha Underground doesn’t play the same rules as the 365 day wresting companies. It’s not about in the moment but the overarching story. That said, King Cuerno is the perfect luchador to be lording over the midcard wrestlers while Mil Muertes taunts the main event luchadors.
Greed over Loyalty?
The Unlikely Trio of Ivelisse, Son of Havoc and Angelico are standing as a trio once again, this time confronting Catrina. This is definitely edited better than season two segments. Catrina said Mil Muertes wants the three to fight each other, which they are completely against until Catrina says the winner gets an immediate shot at Mil Muertes. Two title shots in one night? Talk about pulling out all the stops! They accept the arrangement and Ivelisse makes it clear her and Catrina are not square.
I’ve heard these three are popular in fanfics on Tumblr and I’m not surprised. Angelico is a pretty man now sporting Bieber hair and Ivelisse might be one of the best looking women in wrestling. Son of Havoc is even more shredded than ever, coming back from his appearance on American Ninja Warrior. This should be an interesting bout.
Lucha Underground Championship Title Shot
Angelico vs. Son of Havoc vs. Ivelisse
The Catrina/Melissa Santos stuff is… well, less said the better. It was certainly giving me the vapours. Before the match begins we get a quick segment where King Cuerno in street clothes talks to Catrina and they made it clear they are on the same page. She then disappears. I don’t care, I accept it all!
The great part of this match is that we finally get to see Ivelisse go, and aside from maybe two spots, she was neck and neck with the men. Angelico and Son of Havoc might be far more acrobatic but Ivelisse pulls no punches on her chops, her kicks and her execution. The highlight of the match was Angelico’s knee to Ivelisse in the corner post, which I thought legitimately murdered her. In the end, Ivelisse’s early advantage proves to get her the win.
Even though Angelico might have impressed me wrestling wise a little more overall, Ivelisse getting the win and having the advantage throughout it all gives her the edge. Son of Havoc isn’t chopped liver as he proved capable, but it was nice to see them all be supportive overall. This wasn’t about breaking friendship, it was all about the gold.
Stupid White People Pt. I
A bunch of dudebros in a truck are trying to find the Temple and instead find Black Lotus. She leads them to their death, probably.
Lucha Underground Championship
Ivelisse vs. Mil Muertes (c)
Mil Muertes ascends from his throne to fight Ivelisse, with Angelico and Son of Havoc backing up their Unlikely Trio pal. However, the Disciples of Death ensure that this will be one on one without anyone else around. That is how you do an Authority angle!
The match is basically a squash but with purpose. Mil Muertes is stronger than ever, but he isn’t unbeatable. Ivelisse gets a nasty DDT on him as well as an armbar across the ropes. There was even a missed spear where Muertes took out Catrina, which I think was done a little too early in this season. That said, Muertes hit the flatliner and still looked like pure power. When the lick of death doesn’t come and instead Catrina wants Ivelisse taken out for good, Prince Puma comes out to the rescue! The pop for Puma was big and he certainly still looked like a main eventer. With Ivelisse out to safety and the focus between Muertes and Puma, out comes… Pentagon Jr.!? Not only does Pentagon Jr. get the upper hand on Mil Muertes (with Vampiro looking perplexed and not saying much), he breaks Mil Muertes arm in the middle of the ring! This is unbelievable.
I loved what I saw from Ivelisse but this was a squash match for Mil Muertes. It also set up so much for the season. Pentagon Jr. and Prince Puma are currently the top two to face Mil Muertes throughout the season (probably until Rey Mysterio Jr. makes his debut) and not only that, but instead of just having Mil Muertes be an unstoppable power machine, Pentagon Jr. already smashed through his exterior and might have snapped his arm. This makes the champion very vulnerable over the next little while, unless Catrina can use a little magic to heal him. Talk about a fantastic set-up.
Stupid White People Pt. II
The Dudebros looking for underground fight clubs end up finding our ol pal Dario Cueto, who promises a fight they won’t forget. They enter what doesn’t look like the Temple at all, only for Dario to lock them in. This is continuing the story of Mantanza, the unseen beast that’s Cueto’s brother, who likely eats these three alive. Three less gas station attendants in the world I guess. Especially deserved after the one decided to be sexist towards Black Lotus.
I really don’t like this storyline at all, but it does make me wonder if Mantanza is the eventual monster to come after Mil Muertes. Would be interesting to see those two beasts collide, whomever Mantanza is. I need to see Black Lotus wrestle before I care about her, and right now I honestly do not. Still good to see my boy Dario.
Until next week, keep your mask on!
