One of the things I love about any World Cup is the litany of descriptive and downright funny outbursts by commentators. Now, you do get them in other competitions, for example I remember a commentator remarking when Sione Lauaki ran onto the field, “He’s got so many tattoos he looks like he’s been rolling around in wet comic books” but in the World Cup they just seem better somehow.
RWC 2015 – The Feathers Have Come Home to Roost
I sometimes wonder though, whether modern rugby commentary has lost some of its lustre. There are a few guys who do quite well. Obviously Bill McLaren is the benchmark against which all others are measured. He used to make commentary sound like an epic speech a General would have given in battle in the days of yore, whenever those were.
The Australians are usually quite entertaining, if a bit prone to viewing their team through rose coloured glasses from time to time. The New Zealanders with Justin Marshal and Tony Watson are good and their rugby knowledge excellent. South Africa has Hugh Bladen whose enthusiasm has never waned, despite occasionally getting a bit tongue tied with names like Sailosi Tagicakibau, and Bob Skinstad who is getting better. I don’t know the northern hemisphere commentators too well but I do like it when they have an English speaking Frenchman on the mic, and anyone from Wales, Scotland or Ireland simply need to speak and they already sound wonderful because of their accents. It doesn’t really matter what they say.
Others though, tend to be a bit off the mark. Phil Kearns was a great hooker but is as prone to inserting both feet in his mouth as he is to make a well thought out assessment of what is going on. Joel Stansky has been at commentary for years and is yet to say anything I remember. An incredibly unfair joke doing the rounds a few years back about Joel went something along the lines of “Joel Stansky is amazing, just ask Joel Stransky…”
You’ll get the good, the bad and the ugly whenever you listen to sports commentary. I’d actually prefer to tune into the Afrikaans commentary, just because it sounds so much cooler and they use words like “gemoker” which means “to smash hard” when describing a big tackle, but the other English speakers I usually watch with always object.
At the end of the day though, it is the clichés which really get me laughing. “It all comes down to this”, “this game is going to go down to the wire”, “the team that want it more will win this game”, “the crowd are on the edge of their seats”, “the atmosphere is electric, you could cut the tension… with a knife”, “ill-discipline will cost them dearly”, “the TMO has made yet another shocking decision” and so on and so forth.
Play-off games in particular are full of clichés and for some reason they never get old. I suspect most commentators have them all written down so that if they are every struck speechless they have something to go to.
What do I think about Rugby World Cup 2015? Well, I think it will go down to the wire and that the team that wants it most will take it. The atmosphere at the final will be electric. You will be able to cut the tension with a knife. The best team will win at the end of the day and deserved victors they will be. The crowd will treated to an astonishing display of skill and speed and perhaps, if they’re lucky, good refereeing. The favourites will be tough to beat but watch out for those dark horses because on their day they can beat anyone, if they want it more…
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