Halloween is a crazy time of the year. So many folks dress in festive garb and are at their creative best in this part of the season. I regret my outlandish thought process and loose lips as I led our family into a truly magical group costume. My daughter will be fashioned into the hind legs of a unicorn and will appear to be riding the majestic beast as her parents will be wearing a pair of t-shirts which will complete each other’s rainbow with a felt cloud harnessing the ends.
As a father to a daughter, I’ve come to the conclusion, and acceptance, that there will be plenty of days filled with glitter, tea parties, Disney movies, Barbie’s, and dance and song montages.
This is the kind of creativity that I wish to impart on my children. The reason I say this is I’m starting to question some parenting methodology as of late. Just yesterday, I saw a picture of a child, no more than 10 years old, dressed in a Ray Rice jersey, dragging a doll behind him in what seemed to be a “Halloween” costume.
It is one thing to watch a pair of grown-ups immortalize a truly horrific and despicable scene by dressing the part, but it’s a whole other level to watch irresponsible parents teach their kids that domestic violence is something in which we can all have a laugh. It’s an injustice here. It’s an injustice everywhere. Please use your creative juices in a way that can stimulate a child’s imagination, not cloud their judgment and lower their tolerance.
Sorry for getting heavy there. Let’s get back to the fun things in life. Heading into week 9 we’ve unearthed a lot of gems and failed miserably on others. So this week, in honor of Halloween, we’ll invoke a Trick or Treat edition. I’ll talk about some players that are widely available in most leagues and denote them as a TRICK or TREAT. We’ll need the help as we have a heavy bye week.
Tune-up Tuesdays: Trick or Treat Edition
Bye Week: Atlanta, Buffalo, Chicago, Detroit, Green Bay, Tennessee
Michael Vick, QB NYJ-Michael “the Quick” Vick has finally been announced as the starting QB for the Gangreen. In Smith’s relief against the Bills, he was able to limit himself to throw one interception and rushed for 69 yards on eight attempts. This week he faces a stifling Chiefs defense that has allowed the fewest passing yards so far this season. Don’t be TRICK’d into starting Vick for your bye week QBs.
Brian Hoyer, QB CLE- Hoyer “the Destroyer” rebounded this past week after floundering against a dreadful Jacksonville team. This week he’ll be in front of a Tampa Bay defense that’s allowed over 2,000 yards and 16 touchdowns to opposing quarterbacks. TREAT yourself with some of that action.
Mike Glennon, QB TB- Mike “the Spike” Glennon was forced into a pedestrian showcase last week against a mounting Minnesota defense. I’m afraid that the trend continues when Tampa Bay visits the Dog Pound this week. Joe Haden is so good and yet still underrated, Buster Skrine has eleveated his game, and Donte Whitner looms deep looking to deliver the boom. Receivers are scared, and so should you. TRICK this week, TREAT the next as they host the Falcons
Andre Holmes, WR OAK- Andre “Bones” Holmes has not yet made the Tune-up Tuesday list and I apologize for that. Generally we sift through these players and try to save the ones who are LIKELY to reproduce and emit the LUCKY who have a fluke game. He’s owned in less than half of Yahoo leagues which is a mistake. He faces the daunting Legion of Boom this week, but he’ll be a TREAT if you’re missing your top flight receivers during this bye week.
John Brown, WR ARI- John “Downtown” Brown received critical acclaim from coach Bruce Arians, cementing that Brown reminded him of Marvin Harrison. That’s a wonderful complement, but I’m afraid it won’t do enough to TRICK me into inserting him into my lineup. While Floyd disappeared last week, I’m sure he’ll return to form this week which relinquishes Brown from my scope.
Allen Robinson, WR JAC- Allen “the Talon” Robinson ranks 20th amongst all receivers (including TE and RB) in targets. This places him ahead of notables Randal Cobb, Alshon Jeffery, and Roddy White who all happen to be on a bye week. Do yourself a favor and TREAT your lineup with Robinson who has TDs in back to back games and has at least 50 yards or more in the past four.
Tavaris Cadet, RB NO- Tavaris “I don’t have one yet” Cadet has the fortune of having peers Pierre Thomas and Khiry Robinson still on the sideline for another week. This is good news for him, but with Mark Ingram running like a man on fire, and Drew Brees’ passing game firing on all cylinders, I’d think that the check down won’t be in heavy effect which is a TRICK. Cadet hardly grabs the ball from the backfield and why should you when Ingram is finally earning that first round pick.
Jonathan Stewart, RB CAR- Jonathan “Gone Again” Stewart looked good last week right? He averaged 4.9 yards per carry against a considerable opponent. Even with the return of Deangelo Williams and a decent New Orleans defense, I’d say that Stewart could be a TREAT for those who are suffering the bye week blues.
Lorenzo Taliaferro, RB BAL- Lorenzo “the Terror” Taliaferro actually isn’t too frightening. He was the beneficiary of a pair of red zone scores, but collected 27 yards on seven carries. He did reel in a couple catches for 42 yards which makes him a viable asset, but I cannot TRICK myself into a start this week. Worth the roster spot though.
I’ll spare the suspense, none of these TEs are TREATS, but they’re worth the look since a good TE is hard to come by.
Austin Seferian-Jenkins, TE TB- He lost a costly fumble in overtime against the purple and gold (SKOL VIKES!), but seemed to play an integral part of the Bucs offense otherwise. Desperate play for desperate measures.
Tim Wright, TE NE- Once again Tim Wright teases with a statistical anomaly. Securing all seven targets for 61 yards and a score, Wright continues to trick Fantasy players to the waiver wire. The snap count has to increase in order for me to invest. Hail Mary at best.
Chase Ford, TE MIN- Kyle Rudolph has developed an injurious routine and fortunately for Chase Ford he fits the prototypical Norv Turner mold: Big guy (6’6”) and athletic. The reason I won’t endorse him in full is his inconsistency as a target for the young Bridgewater. A faltering offensive line calls for extra help on the ends. Ford needs to help on blocking assignments more than they need him on the receiving end.
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