Wrestlemania is WWE’s biggest show of the year. You can ask any fan or employee in the company, it is a night filled with prestige, with an electricity. Wrestlemania is a magical night fuelled by an energy that can’t be put into words, but that doesn’t mean there hasn’t been some stinkers. Arguments have been made for Wrestlemania IV (4), XI (11), XIII (13), and even some say last year’s XXIX (29) as the worst of “the show of shows”. For this wrestling fan though, it doesn’t get any worse than Wrestlemania IX (9).
Wrestlemania IX emanated from Caesar’s Palace in Las Vegas and WWE really embraced this by having the entire thing have a Roman theme. I can appreciate the attempt, and there were certain things that were interesting like The Undertaker’s funeral chariot, but in many ways fell flat. While Bobby “The Brain” Heenan coming out on a camel facing the wrong way had comedic merit, to go from Gorilla Monsoon as host talking about wearing a toga, to Jim Ross as the play by play announcer talking about wearing a toga, to the entrances of “Macho Man” Randy Savage and Heenan as the rest of the commentary team, and finally to the renamed “Finkus Maximus” Howard Finkel to introduce the first match, it was way too long. I’m sure WWE wanted it to feel special, but the theme just comes off as cheesy and campy now, so I’m not surprised that no celebrities wanted anything to do with it.
Something that the 13 year old me didn’t notice at the time but I certainly noticed now, was the lack of celebrities at the event. WWE usually goes out of their way to get some sort of celebrity involvement in Wrestlemania, usually in the hopes of garnering some mainstream attention. Oftentimes the celebrities involvement comes off as forced or unnecessary, but it’s still something that when missing is noticeable. The only celebrities remotely involved were the Caesar and Cleopatra impersonators that paraded around at the start. Then WWE announcer Todd Pettengill managed to find R & B singer Natalie Cole in attendance and asked her a couple of questions, but it was hardly planned.
I feel that the event lost some visual appeal due to its outdoor venue. There was virtually no lighting to speak of and what little pyro they had didn’t have great effect since it was still within daylight hours. However, daylight hours by no means refers to very much sunlight. With the exception of a couple rare moments, the entire three hour show was shrouded by dreary, grey clouds. Virtually the entire event was overcast. I suppose, on the plus side, it didn’t rain.
Switching focus to the card, it was mediocre at best, and I think this is what truly brings it down in my opinion. There weren’t any memorable matches on this show. At least none to be remembered in a good light. The Undertaker vs Giant Gonzalez has to be the lowest point in the illustrious Streak. Not only is it a terrible match, but the Deadman won by disqualification when Gonzalez incapacitated Undertaker with a “chloroform-soaked cloth”. The Undertaker, as with the majority of his career, was a big deal at this point. It’s not like Giant Gonzalez would have lost momentum if he had lost the match legitimately. They could have still done the DQ ending by having Gonzalez’s manager, Harvey Wippleman, interfere instead of attempting to subdue the phenom with chemicals. If they wanted to incapacitate The Undertaker, have Gonzalez choke slam him 4 or 5 times, maybe hit him with a chair, or the urn. The only highlights to this match were Undertaker’s entrance, and his re-emergence after being taken out on a stretcher. Ironically, neither of those moments took place during the actual match.
The main event didn’t fare much better, as we saw Bret “Hitman” Hart defend the then WWF World Heavyweight Championship against the 500 lb. Yokozuna. They put on a decent match, but nothing to write home about. The most memorable thing about this match was Hart getting screwed out of the championship only to have Hulk Hogan, who had only recently returned to the company, come out and beat the 500 pounder for the title in an impromptu match. A match in which, for those keeping score, never had the bell ring to start or end the match, but I suppose that’s just semantics. I can understand wanting to send the fans home happy, but way to bury two top guys at the time. Yoko would go on to beat Hogan at King of the Ring just over two months later, so it’s like it never happened anyway.
Far and away the best match on the card was a throwaway undercard match which saw “The Narcissist” Lex Luger face Mr. Perfect. It was Luger’s first pay-per-view match with the company so the outcome was somewhat predictable, however it was still a well wrestled match and one of the few bright spots of this show.
Speaking of bright spots, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that Wrestlemania IX was Jim Ross’ onscreen debut with WWE and would be the start of a legendary announcing career. His commentary throughout the event shines. He plays well off of Heenan and is (as he’s always been) a fantastic play by play announcer.
I can still watch this event and think about when I watched it live on pay-per-view as a youngster, but there’s very few memorable moments for me with Wrestlemania IX. With a lack of pomp and circumstance that is often found in the show, and the most memorable match being the one part of The Streak most fans would rather forget, I can’t help but feel that Wrestlemania IX is the worst Wrestlemania there is.
Is there a Wrestlemania that you think is worse than this one? Let me know with #WorstWrestlemania and #LWOSwrestling
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