There is currently a lot of buzz surrounding the idea of Hulk Hogan and Roddy Piper wrestling each other in some way at Wrestlemania XXX. For some, it’s about standing in the corners of other wrestlers similar to the first Wrestlemania main event where Superfly Jimmy Snuka was in Hulk Hogan and Mr. T’s corner while Cowboy Bob Orton stood in the corner of Roddy Piper and Paul Orndorff. There are others who want the two legends to wrestle, or even see Hulk Hogan go one on one with John Cena in the main event.
The idea of Hulk Hogan and Roddy Piper wrestling in 2014 brings me back to a Jim Cornette rant about Icons back in 1997, where he bantered about the idea of two old foggies like Hogan and Piper having the audacity to call themselves the “icons” of professional wrestling. He expressed embarrassment for their cage match and now we’re going to watch Hogan and Piper in 2014? Heck, the two guys Cornette said were closer to being icons in Bret “The Hitman” Hart and “The Heartbreak Kid” Shawn Michaels have both now been retired for years since then! It’s a bit embarrassing. While I’m not alone on it, I know there’s a lot of people (including fellow LWOS analyst Adam Contant) who love the idea of them wrestling because he focuses on the enjoyment of the crowd instead of the potential of it being extremely embarrassing for everyone involved. If you want to see what happens when old wrestlers get in the ring and everything goes wrong, here’s a link. And here’s a link. Oh here’s Hogan and Flair failing to turn back the clocks in 2009.
But the WWE does have all of these legends of the ring from the 70s, 80s and 90s. Surely they have some value beyond a few WWE Raw appearances and the Legend’s House reality show that we haven’t seen yet because it’s the golden jewel of the future WWE Network. There has to be something worth their while, right?
So I have an idea. And it comes from the UFC. Sort of.
I could write 2,000 words on the misuse of managers in today’s wrestling industry. One of the greatest points of value for a manager was immediate legitimacy when a wrestler was found by their side. If you saw Bobby “The Brain” Heenan come down to the ring with a wrestler you knew there was a chance this guy could win by being a part of the Heenan Family. Whether it be the Dangerous Alliance, the Four Horsemen, the Disciples of Synn or even the New World Order, being a part of an establishment with a figurehead gave you credibility on loan. Today, wrestlers debut all of the time and struggle to get people to care about them. They can’t throw on an nWo t-shirt and now have Eric Bischoff hype them up.
If the WWE doesn’t want to fully embrace managers anymore (aside from Zeb Colter and Paul Heyman, who seem to get veteran immunity status to this) they can do something else. When I first watched UFC, I remember that when people talked about Ken Shamrock, they also talked about The Lion’s Den. The Lion’s Den was the first mixed martial arts team formed in the United States, with Shamrock joining Vernon White and Guy Mezger. If you were a member of the Den, we knew it by the t-shirt. We knew it by the names in it. There was a credibility to being in the Lion’s Den. Someone might not know who you are until they find out what MMA team you’re fighting for.
So think about it. You got Hulk Hogan. You got guys in NXT you know are talented but nobody is going to really care about them at first. What if you announced on Twitter they signed with TEAM HULKAMANIA? That they were going to train in Tampa at Hogan’s Beach and the Hulkster himself was going to come to the ring with them in their first match? Suddenly, people have something to identify with these guys. But wait, it seems that one of them has left TEAM HULKAMANIA and he’s been seen signing documents with Rowdy Roddy Piper. Is it true? Yes, he’s joined the PIPER’S PIT. Now he’s coming down to the ring in a white t-shirt and you know his old friend on TEAM HULKAMANIA wants to know the scoop.
I haven’t said a word on who these guys are, if they are good wrestlers, just that they are talented but suddenly, without a single match, you have a reason to see them fight. It’s going to be the top Pro Wrestling teams squaring off with each other. It goes beyond just rookies. You need a reason to get a tag team together? Well Tyson Kidd is a member of the HART DYNASTY and Bret “The Hitman” Hart just told him that he signed a new member to the team: Evan Bourne! Now if the two start tag teaming, everyone knows why. They are both wearing pink shirts. Clearly they are members of the HART DYNASTY. Want to turn a wrestler heel? Word got out that Dolph Ziggler joined Ted Dibiase Sr. in MONEY INC. He just sold out! Want to turn a wrestler babyface? Alberto Del Rio doesn’t have to do some big speech about changing his ways. He can just take some time off and return as the newest member of Dusty Rhodes’s AMERICAN DREAM TEAM.
You now have all of these legends using their names and likenesses to help strengthen the product. Once a young wrestler establishes himself, he can move on from wearing his team t-shirt to wearing his own t-shirt (and yes, this means the WWE opens up extra t-shirt revenue with the Team shirts). WWE already played around with the team concept when doing the Rock/Cena feud. Now they can take it to another level. And while some legends can just make an appearance or two (the last thing you want is Ric Flair back on the road, well, if you want to run a respectable company) you can have other legends actually work as road agents and mentor these wrestlers. It’s an extra paycheck and a chance to once again travel like a superstar while giving back. And unlike seeing Hogan breaking a hip against a fat Roddy Piper in front of the world at Wrestlemania, it isn’t embarrassing.
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