The Goodell vs. Selig Pissing Match, NFL "Sex Talk", Ed Reed and Bacon

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The NFL is a smorgasbord of awesome storylines.  Some are analytical, others are critical, and some are just down right stupid.  It’s the stupid ones I live for – they make my day.  Welcome to Quick Slant.  I created this column as my way of sharing with you the headlines from around the NFL that I feel are most interesting.  I try to offer my own take on the story in as few words as possible – some of us have a wife, kids and a job and don’t have time to read 5000+ word novels!  So, without further ado, I give you today’s version of Quick Slant:

RoryHarbaughlogo1Let’s start with some positive news.  The NFL has agreed to institute the “Brian Cushing Rule” (or the Peel-Back Rule) to prevent offensive players from blocking defensive players from behind, below the waist. Good stuff!  They also instituted an alignment rule that limits a team to put more than six players on one half of centre during a FG block. Further, the defensive players aren’t allowed to push their own players into the offensive players.  Huh? Now we have a pushing penalty?……The NFL is considering major changes to the Pro Bowl. Here’s an idea – take some TNT and blow the whole damn thing up……Traditionally the SuperBowl Champion opens the NFL season, which should be on Thursday, Sept 5 at M&T Bank Stadium. The problem is the Orioles are playing that day at 7:05pm at Camden Yards.  They share parking facilities.  The problem? Selig is afraid the Ravens tailgaters will scare the crap out of the Orioles fans……Speaking of Rocket Roger, he sent a firm message to NFL teams that the leagPue will not tolerate questioning players’ sexual preference. Hey, he’s on a roll.  Good job……Steve Bisciotti‘s gut tells him Ed Reed will be back with his Baltimore Ravens. My gut tells me I want pancakes and bacon. I have no bacon, and he has no Ed Reed – for now……The Broncos have offered Elvis Dumervil a contract.  Before their blunder, they would have had to pay him $8 million in 2013. The new offer? It’s expected to include gift cards to TJ Maxx, a Sham-wow, and a signing bonus of free pizza for a year from Domino’s……In QB news the Titans have signed Ryan Fitzpatrick to back up Jake Locker, the Harvard grad learned the Titan’s playbook in 3.2 minutes….. The Colts meanwhile picked up discarded QB Matt Hasselback, his sister in law Elizabeth is still trying to figure out what to do with the first book she was ever given, something to do with Clifford the Big Red Dog….  Rex Ryan has stated that the Jets quarterback position is “wide open” and that Tim Tebow is in the mix. So, let’s review – the Jets 2012 season was successful enough that as of now Mark Sanchez is the starter with Tebow nipping at his heels. And out a sheer stroke of brilliance, David Garrard was brought in for, umm, moral support? Rise, Jets fans!  Just say “no” to stupidity!

 

That does it for today.  Check back tomorrow and I’ll have sifted through the day’s headlines and give you what you need to know.

Follow me on twitter @RoryHarbaughNFL and the site @lastwordonsport

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photo credit: Matt McGee via photopin cc